Where can you find 700 contact lense cases, orphaned Lego pieces and tokens to an arcade that burned down 10 years ago? That's right, your junk drawer! It serves as a halfway-house for stuff too obscure to categorize, yet too sacred to throw away.

So, I created my own "virtual-reality techno Junk Drawer of the future" right here on thismayhurt.com. Not only will I be throwing shit in here whenever the mood strikes me, but so will my very special guest, Rachel "Why Are You Making Me Do This?" Corus. So strap yourselves in, as we're all bound to be on a crash course with "wackiness." Enjoy.

June 2004

site revamp // lacki threw this into the junk drawer on Thursday, 06.24.04
BIG changes coming to your local THISMAYHURT.com subsidiary. Big enough to warrent underlined, bolded and italicized text, you ask? Yes... well maybe the underline was pushing it a bit, but BIG nonetheless. It's so BIG that I haven't even figured out what it is yet, but I know that it's going to increase our "chuckle output" by about 12% and our "bemused wonder" factor by about 30%. The numbers don't lie people, even when the person providing the numbers has lied under oath in a court of law roughly 87% of the time. Between this site and my old, corny whitenoise site, I've been writing on the internet for about 5 years, and my proverbial well of Grade-A material is running dry. But have no fear! In the next 7 - 8 months, I'll come up with something, and it will be thoroughly ridiculous and horrible. Stay tuned!

The Daily Show TONIGHT // lacki threw this into the junk drawer on Monday, 06.21.04
Rachel and I will be appearing on the Daily Show tonight (in the studio audience)! So if you have a sharp eye, you might see us laughing hysterically at one of Jon Stewart's trademark deadpan stares. Taping starts at around 4:30, the show airs at 11 p.m. on Comedy Central. Tonight's special guest is Stephen F. Hayes, the staff writer from The Weekly Standard whose recent article, Case Closed, reported on the U.S. government's secret memo detailing the links between Saddam Hussein and Osama bin Laden.

$free r1ngt0nez !!!!!!! // lacki threw this into the junk drawer on Wednesday, 06.09.04
Last night I downloaded 38,000 ringtones. No, seriously. It was a 250 MB .rar file overflowing with 38,000 midi ringtones. I was particularly happy about my find until I remembered that I always keep my phone on vibrate, and I really don't need 13 variations of a "I'm Not a Girl But I'm Also Not a Woman Yet, Either" ringtone. Fucking midi's. All I want is a decent Castlevania ringtone that sounds exactly like it did in the game. I don't need it to sound like it's being played on a pipe organ or an orchestra of kazoos.

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