August 2004

QuickTime faggotry // lacki threw this into the junk drawer on Wednesday, 08.25.04
What did I do last night? I spent about two hours trying to extract a clip from a Black Flag DVD for the long-neglected media section on TMH. I finally extracted the video as a QuickTime .mov, added the audio into the clip, and uploaded it. It looked great at home on my Mac. It looked less than great on my PC at work. Apparently you need QuickTime Pro to convert the .mov into an .mp4, but it costs $30, and no one's ever going to watch the stupid clip anyway. All right, I admit it, I just wanted an excuse to use the emo wrist slit icon. Any of you hackers out there know how to convert .mov's into .avi's, .mpeg's, .lol's, or .fag5's?

no juice (373 words) // lacki threw this into the junk drawer on Tuesday, 08.17.04
My Powerbook ain't got no juice. My A/C charger is busted, and the battery is down to about 40%. Did I mention that my Powerbook battery has magical powers? It can drain an entire battery in 30 minutes or less! It's probably because I never run on battery power; I always have it plugged in, so the battery can't handle complex tasks like holding a charge and not being retarded. Knowing that my battery is a retarded piece of shit, I ordered a new powerbrick from Best Buy yesterday because I have a Best Buy credit card, and I'm trying to raise my life-long credit limit to somewhere above $800. Unfortunately, they haven't processed my order because they're stupid bastards, and how am I supposed to download ultra-violent Korean horror movies and 7,000 episodes of Aqua Teen Hunger Force? Sure, I could use my father's computer in the next room, but it's all the way over there, and my hallway is fraught with both unparalleled terror and an unhealthy dosage of peril that is way above the recommended daily dosage of peril. If I don't hear back from Best Buy soon, I'm just going to have to drive down there, storm through the doors, pick up the closest plasma tv, strap it to my back and run as fast as my quivering legs will allow. A $6,000 tv should make up for all the pain and suffering I've been going through... barely.

Why don't I just go to the nearest Apple Store? Because the nearest Apple Store is in the Short Hills Mall, and I don't have access to the proper Short Hills Mall attire, such as a tuxedo, tophat, cane and monocle. I don't even like wearing pants when I go to the mall, and these fuckers are all like, "I'm sorry sir, you have to rent pants from us if you want to enjoy a shopping experience at the Mall at Short Hills," and I'm like, "OK, fine, how much does it cost to rent pants from you?" and they're like, "$300" and I'm like, "Fuck that, I'll take my business to the Willowbrook Mall where I can walk around with my testicles exposed if I so desire, good day good sir."

Too long; didn't read version: My Powerbook's A/C charger is dead, I pout like a bitch, and the Short Hills Mall is for preppy faggots.

X-Box Live (round 2 FIGHT) // lacki threw this into the junk drawer on Wednesday, 08.11.04
I'm retarded, and for one reason or another, I can't access X-Box Live with my modchip turned off. I still have an active account, I just can't seem to establish a connection, and I don't want to accidentally get my account banned. So, I'm just going to bite the bullet and pick up a refurbished X-Box from Electronics Boutique for $100 so I can once again enjoy the thrill of getting fragged by 11-year-olds and Japanese gaming prodigies. That being said, do any of you out there have X-Box Live accounts? The only Live-compatible games that I own (well, that I have on media and not ripped to my super mod box) are Rainbow Six 3, Unreal Championship and Mechassault, but I'll definitely pick up that Street Fighter collection in September, Halo 2 in November and possibly Doom 3 if I don't have a PC by the time the inferior X-Box version is released. I'm pretty sure my handle is TMH718 (718 is Brooklyn's area code and the title of a very nostalgia-inducing 2 Skinnee J's song), so look me up in the next few days. Just let me win a few rounds so I can justify the purchase of a second X-Box.

R.A.T.S. // lacki threw this into the junk drawer on Friday, 08.06.04
I've been battling strange stomach cramps for the past week. At first I thought my appendix burst, but I'd probably be dead by now if that was the case. Next, I thought I was pregnant, because I haven't had my period in 22 years, and I have lots and lots of unprotected sex with extremely fertile and handsome men. Now, I'm not exactly sure what it is, but every trip to the bathroom yields unexpected surprises. Therefore, I've decided to Rage Against the Stomach (R.A.T.S.) and, in typical lacki fashion, just say, "Fuck it" and ignore the problem until either a) the pain subsides or b) my appendix decides to burst and shower my organs in exotic poisons. So, if the site goes un-updated for another week or so, just assume the worst and pour a 40 out on the curb for me, your fallen homie.

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